The 5 Communication Styles: What is yours? Why it matters
Leadership is all about communication. It’s about having the right conversations in the right way, with the right people, at the right time.
Now we all have a built-in conversation style. We tend to automatically operate from that place.
For the most part, this is not a problem.
Sometimes our natural approach can backfire… and I don’t think I’d be exaggerating if I said this could lead to resentment, anger, frustration, resignations, serial killings and nuclear war (ok, the last two might be exaggerations).
In this and the following posts I’ll show you different approaches leaders can take, based on two key factors.
The first is the directness of their words. Some leaders like to talk straight. They tell it like it is, regardless of the consequences. Others prefer to talk around an issue, perhaps to handle things with more of a “velvet glove.”
The second factor is timing. Some leaders like to talk now, while an issue is red hot. Others prefer to talk later, delaying conversations until things have cooled down or more data has been gathered.
These two factors neatly combine to produce four distinct “Communication Styles,” and I’ve given each one a Name name:
(1) The “Commander” likes to speak quickly and directly, with little fear of conflict. They assume their approach causes things to get done.
(2) The “Archer” likes to plan their words, taking slow and careful aim before firing them with surgical precision. They believe their style reflects attention to detail.
(3) The “Diplomat” is careful with their timing and thoughtful with their words, placing a premium on kindness and patience.
(4) The “Consultant” is quick with words and adept at using verbal sleight-of-hand to achieve results. They might think of themselves as masters of influence.
Now, these also happen to be characters for the next Marvel movie that will be set in my office.
Exciting news, right? I’ll tell you more in a moment. Let me just get this leadership stuff out of the way first.
What’s more important here (for you), is that many leaders adopt one of these Communication Styles as their own.
Even if you haven’t personally, there are still three important things you need to know.
(Hey, if you’re short on time, skip to #3 which is the critical one. But to be completely blunt, you’re probably better off reading #1 and #2 as well, and just skipping this bracketed statement.)
#1. Each style of communication has a “light” side… which is basically the upside of using it.
#2. At the same time, it will also have a “shadow.” This concept is probably a complete mystery to you at the moment, so let me just give you a tiny hint of what I mean: it’s bad stuff like... the unintended consequences of using a style inappropriately.
#3. There is also a fifth Communication Style: the “Conductor.”
The “Conductor” has easy access to the other four styles, and knows how and when to deploy each one for maximum impact.
This is the one I want to gently steer you towards over the coming posts, because it trumps all the others… which is why I hope you’ll stick with me on this short journey we’re about to take. I promise it will be worth your time.
Plus, I can update you on how the movie is coming along.
Unfortunately, whether the “Conductor” character will make it in is still up for debate, as well as… like, the whole movie itself.
Apparently the studio executives are concerned a movie based around my office might be, uhhh... a little dull?
Pffft.
Trust me, it will be anything but dull. They haven’t seen the things I can do with a stapler yet. Pretty sure that’s gonna clinch the deal.
Anyway, we’ll explore the “Commander” Communication Style in the next post… and I’ll show you why this approach is useful in some situations, but explosive in others.
